3rd day of mission puffing clean air
im starting to feel a little light headed. runny nose is starting to kick in. i ran out of breathe on several ocasions (a little bit paradox to the situation tho). my head is not thinking straight. i was sweating for no reasons.
those are some of the symptoms i noticed after 'successfully' stopping for 3 days. 3 long days without any puff of cigarette. i think its a bit early for my body to crave for cigs like a junkie after only 3 days of stopping as i only smoke around 5-7 cigs a day depending on the level of stress accumulated. it might only be a flu on the way or it might be 'withdrawal syndrom' as told by mama. but the thought of having withdrawal syndrom is way cooler than just having a normal flu.
so my third day went quite well. I changed most of my routine throughout the day. i avoided the cafe at faculty. i went to perform my friday prayers at API instead of at ttdi so i can avoid my smoking friends. i suck on candy instead of having a smoke (not a good idea..i finished 2 packets of polo within half of the day..i might stop smoking bt sweet pee (kencing manis) is not what i have in mind).
bt even after all that, the thought of smoking came around 5 times today. and the strongest urge to smoke was when Mr. Rossi broke the news bout Mr. Raja wanting us to re-do our presentation and report. all 2 and a half months of work worth only 2 marks. how iron nail (kuku besi) style of educating some of our lecturers have.
and with this i end my ramblings with a song that was played on my way back from class before getting busted:
Rihanna- rehab
Baby, baby
When we first met
I never felt something so strong
You were like my lover
And my best friend
All wrapped into one
With a ribbon on it
And all of a sudden
You went, left
I didn't know how to follow
It's like a shot
That spun me around
And now my heart left
I feel so empty and hollow
[Pre Chorus:]
And I'll never give myself to another
The way I gave it to you
Don't even recognize
The ways you hurt me
Do you?
It's gonna take a miracle to bring me back
And you're the one to blame
[Chorus:]
And now I feel like, oh
You're the reason
Why I'm thinking
I don't wanna smoke on These cigarettes no more
I guess that's what I get
For wishful thinking
I should've never let you enter my door
Next time you wanna go on and leave
I should just let you go on and do it
Cause now I'm using like I bleed
It's like I checked into rehab and
Baby, you're my disease
It's like I checked into rehab and
Baby, you're my disease
I gotta check into rehab
'Cause baby you're my disease
I gotta check into rehab
'Cause baby you're my disease
[Verse 2:]
Damn,
Ain't it crazy when you're love swept?
You'll do anything for the one you love
'Cause anytime that you needed me
I'd be there
It's like you were my favorite drug
The only problem is
That you was using me
In a different way that I was using you
But now that I know, it's not meant to be
You gotta go, I gotta ween myself off of you
[Pre Chorus:]
And I'll never give myself to another
The way I gave it to you
Don't even recognize
The ways you hurt me
Do you?
It's gonna take a miracle to bring me back
And you're the one to blame
i dedicate this song to all my beloved friends who supported me through this 3 days of torment. you guys know who u are. n bob..noo ur not one of them..whos bob? im hallucinating..
When we first met
I never felt something so strong
You were like my lover
And my best friend
All wrapped into one
With a ribbon on it
And all of a sudden
You went, left
I didn't know how to follow
It's like a shot
That spun me around
And now my heart left
I feel so empty and hollow
[Pre Chorus:]
And I'll never give myself to another
The way I gave it to you
Don't even recognize
The ways you hurt me
Do you?
It's gonna take a miracle to bring me back
And you're the one to blame
[Chorus:]
And now I feel like, oh
You're the reason
Why I'm thinking
I don't wanna smoke on These cigarettes no more
I guess that's what I get
For wishful thinking
I should've never let you enter my door
Next time you wanna go on and leave
I should just let you go on and do it
Cause now I'm using like I bleed
It's like I checked into rehab and
Baby, you're my disease
It's like I checked into rehab and
Baby, you're my disease
I gotta check into rehab
'Cause baby you're my disease
I gotta check into rehab
'Cause baby you're my disease
[Verse 2:]
Damn,
Ain't it crazy when you're love swept?
You'll do anything for the one you love
'Cause anytime that you needed me
I'd be there
It's like you were my favorite drug
The only problem is
That you was using me
In a different way that I was using you
But now that I know, it's not meant to be
You gotta go, I gotta ween myself off of you
[Pre Chorus:]
And I'll never give myself to another
The way I gave it to you
Don't even recognize
The ways you hurt me
Do you?
It's gonna take a miracle to bring me back
And you're the one to blame
i dedicate this song to all my beloved friends who supported me through this 3 days of torment. you guys know who u are. n bob..noo ur not one of them..whos bob? im hallucinating..
written by : fotografer pakse
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